Upside Down and Backwards
by Blackrose715378
Summary: Mooses are cool.


A/N: Muse on the fritz equals a return to minifics until I decide where the hell I'm taking Domestic Chaos. And thanks to Akili for reading and picking up a little error lol.

Upside Down and Backwards 

Sometimes, you lose the desire to get out of bed in the morning. Every meal is tasteless, and every sunrise less impressive than the last. You try to fill your daytime hours with meaningless tasks, but you don't even have the will to get off the couch. All day you're tired, lethargic, waiting for the earliest reasonable hour you can go to bed. Then when that time arrives, you can't sleep. Lying there in the dark makes way for thoughts, for mental pathways that you'd much rather not follow. But you don't have a choice. And suddenly you're not tired anymore. Sometimes it feels like the only reason you're still alive is because you haven't died yet.

Berto Martinez's older brother had been his life. Carlos had always been there for him, the constant in his life. For as long as he could remember, Berto had always felt like everything important to him was continuously slipping through his fingers. Like picking up a fistful of sand on the beach, the grains would never stay for long. Always slipping through your fingers no matter how hard you tried to hold onto them. His father-shot dead in the street. His home in Colombia had been left behind. Grandparents slowly taken from him one by one. But Carlos had always been there for him. Always. He promised. He said he would never leave. And now he was dead. Dead. Gone. Forever.

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Distraction was costing him today. Big time. And Kat was having way too much fun taking advantage of the fact. Max stumbled back a step as one of Kat's punches caught him square in the jaw. He immediately prepared himself for the next attack, but none came. Instead, Kat just folded her arms across her chest and stared at him, exasperated. "For god's sake just go check on him already!"

"I shouldn't," Max said, unconvincingly.

Kat rolled her eyes. "Oh? And why not?"

"It's none of my business! If Berto wants to take a sick day he's entitled!"

"When's the last time he's ever taken a sick day!" Here Kat's voice softened a bit, knowing she was letting worry get the better of her. "Look. Berto's been there to deal with all the stuff you've been going through. He's been with you since the beginning. You should go see if he's ok."

Max sighed and sank down to sit on the ground. "Well, I can't do it until after work, anyway."

Now, Kat was losing her patience. "Remind me never to depend on you for moral support. I'll cover for you. Now get the hell out of here and go see Martinez!"

Max couldn't help but smile. "I'll tell him you miss him too."

Kat turned around and stormed off, but she didn't think she pulled off the angry act very well. She was too preoccupied thinking about Berto. Passing by his empty console saddened her. There was nothing exploding, no sound of fingers typing on keys, no shouts of glee as the computer lost yet another chess game. The room was like a vacuum.

_Forget it,_ she suddenly thought. _I'm not letting Steel handle this alone._

It had been a slow day, she reasoned with herself, and without Berto around, any mission that came up would most likely not end well. So, no one should miss her if she went on a break for half an hour or so. Nonchalantly, she walked down the hallway, got into the elevator and hit the button for the employee garage. Figuring Max would have to take a slightly sneakier route to avoid being seen by Jefferson, Kat figured she would have at least a few extra minutes she could use to get to Berto's apartment first. She would much rather get there before Max, because, well, he could be an idiot when it came to situations like this.

Noticing that Shadow was still in its parking space, she enjoyed a moment of silent victory. She debated whether or not she should wait for Max, or actually probably Josh, but then decided against it. He would probably want to make a race out of it, and she'd rather be concentrating on what she was going to say to their friend instead of not mowing down old ladies on Hilltop Road.

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Arriving at her destination after ten minutes of driving in thankfully little traffic, Kat pulled up in the driveway of the large brick building and turned off the ignition. She breathed in deeply, then got out of the car and started towards the door. In the back of her mind, she heard herself say that she had not signed on for partners in the first place, much less emotional counseling, but she quickly shut herself up. She owed Berto at least this.

Glancing at the scrap of paper she carried with her, she climbed the stairs and let herself into the lobby. Quickly locating the stairs, she ascended to the second floor and found apartment 26 at the end of the hallway. Taking another deep breath, she knocked loudly on the door and got an automated voice as an answer.

"Roberto Martinez isn't home now, but if you'd like to leave your name and where you can be reached…"

Kat muttered to herself. "Has an answering machine for the door." She knocked again. "Berto, I know you're in there."

"Roberto Martinez isn't home now, but…"

"Ok fine. Have it your way." Pulling a key out of her jeans pocket, she unlocked the door and let herself in. Entering the apartment and closing the door behind her, she surveyed her surroundings and noticed that everything, of course, was a mess, but no Berto. Deciding she didn't want to see whatever unspeakable horrors haunted the kitchen, she instead decided to check the bedroom. "Martinez?" she called, "Where the hell are you?"

"In here," came the lethargic reply from the living room she had just been in. He had been just out of sight because the large screen tv blocked part of the room. Hanging upside down from the couch, Berto was watching a soccer match with the volume off and a bottle of beer in his right hand.

Observing the pathetic scene in front of her, Kat had to suppress a grin. "You're not old enough to drink," she informed him as she sat down on the couch next to his inverted form and gently took the bottle from him and went to take a sip.

Reaching up, he grabbed it back from her. "And you're on duty." He replied, and she could've sworn she saw the ghost of a smile on his face.

Sighing dramatically, she said "You're right. Guess neither of us can have it." She took it back from him and put it on the floor next to the couch…just out of his reach. "Now. You want to tell me why you're upside down?"

"Due to the distortion of the senses that comes as a result of inversion, the mind is convinced that the players are actually defying gravity. It's more interesting."

Kat rolled her eyes. "I had to ask." Grabbing hold of the arm rest, she turned herself backwards and mimicked his position. They watched the game together in silent communion for a few minutes. Then, knowing that they did have to do some talking, she said quietly "Jeff told us about your brother."

"Figures."

"Don't sound like that. We were worried. You haven't missed a day of work in three years."

"Cause I don't have a life."

"Sure you do. You watch soccer upside down." She smiled. "And besides, you always have me and Max…or Josh…whoever he happens to be at the time."

"Thanks for coming over, Kat."

"Don't read too far into it. I was just tired of Steel being so out of it without you around."

"Where is he, anyway?"

As if on cue, Josh burst through the door holding a box of pizza. He started to say something, but was cut short by the sight of Kat and Berto hanging upside down off the couch next to each other watching tv with the sound off. "Um…are you two all right?"

"Is that pizza?" Berto seemed to snap out of his daze for the first time since Kat had arrived.

"Guy loves his food." Kat brought herself rightside up again, then stood up and helped Berto up.

"Hey, Bro," Josh waved a piece of pizza in front of the younger man's face. "Hungry?"

Berto ignored the piece Josh was holding and grabbed the whole box. "You have to ask, hermano?"

"If you two think you're going to finish that all by yourself again you're so wrong." Kat folded her arms across her chest.

Berto grinned. "I don't know, Kat, I _am_ pretty hungry…"

"Well, fine then, Josh can spare his piece." Grabbing the piece from Josh's hand as he was lifting it to his mouth, Kat stuck her tongue out at him and sat down on the couch and unmuted the television. "Now who wants to watch soccer?"

"Soccer's a girl sport!" Josh protested.

Berto threw a piece of pizza at him. "I'm in mourning, so I get to pick what we watch, and I say we're watching soccer." With that, he plopped down on the couch next to Kat and started devouring his pizza.

"All right. But next time we're watching skateboarding." Josh squeezed himself between Berto and the armrest. "By the way, bro, you need a bigger couch."

"Sorry, not used to having company."

Kat rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I could tell from the décor," she nodded her head towards a bowl of cereal on top of the ceiling fan. "You know, I'm not even going to ask about _that_."

Berto stared at the bowl. "Good idea."

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They had been watching the game and commenting enthusiastically on the skill of the players (even Josh) for about an hour when the phone rang. Berto picked answered it, and was only half surprised to hear Jefferson Smith's voice on the other line.

"Dr. Martinez, good to hear your voice," Smith greeted him.

"You too, sir."

"Berto, maybe you could help me out here. It seems that two of my best agents have gone missing. Do you know where they could possibly be?"

Berto smiled, knowing that Smith knew exactly where Kat and Josh were. Still, he had to play the game. "Well, how long have they been missing?"

"Oh, I'd say about a hour and a half."

"You know, I haven't heard from them. Maybe they're training."

Jefferson started to respond when he heard Josh shout loudly in triumph as the team he had been cheering for scored a goal. He was accompanied by the booing of half the crowd and the broadcaster's drawn out "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!" and by Kat's fist pounding into the arm of the sofa.

"I didn't know Josh liked soccer," he said instead.

Berto laughed. "I think Josh can get into any sport. Not that he's here."

"Oh, no," Jefferson laughed also. "I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Thanks, sir."

Berto ended the call and then squeezed back onto the couch between his two best friends.

_Hm…I worked on this two different days, so that would explain the change of tone after the first two or three paragraphs…sorry lol. _


End file.
